Posts filtered by tags: Personal[x]


Does Crying Help or Hurt Depression?

Tears. I liken them to numinous mist or emotional sign language. “They’re considered a release, a psychological tonic, and to many a glimpse of something deeper: the heart’s own sign language, emotional perspiration from the well of common humanity,” writes Benedict Carey in his New York Times piece “The Muddled Track of All Those Tears.” The Healing Property of Tears Tears heal us in several ways. They remove toxins from our body that build up from stress, like the endorphin leucine-enkaphali...
Tags: Psychology, Crying, Personal, Self-help, Depression, New York Times, Netherlands, Grief And Loss, Niagara Falls, Mental Health And Wellness, Bergman, Washington Irving, University of South Florida, Journal of Research, Benedict Carey, Jerry Bergman

in which we reluctantly begin the search for a new vehicle

We were warned about this! We were half-expecting it.Our car didn't pass the inspection for BC auto insurance. Supposedly this is what happens when you bring a car from another province. We drive an old (2006) Kia Spectra, which we bought two years ago when our even older (2005) Chevy Optra was hit by a careless driver and our insurance carrier dumped it. Considering its age and its 155,000 kilometres, the Kia has been very solid. Before we drove west, we brought it for a full check-up and got e...
Tags: Travel, Personal, Kia, Allan, Laura K, Moving To Bc

Crazy Vivid Travel Anxiety Dream

The brain in sleep state is a fascinating thing. I have been awake for 30 minutes and the dream is lingering. While it’s not as vivid as when I woke up, the details are still there. Maybe it is a result of the Super Blood Wolf Moon. Or maybe its because I’m traveling today. I’m in an airport casually talking to someone who has stopped me to ask me a question. I realize it is 6:35am and my flight leaves at 6:30am. I rush to the gate to find that my plane has departed to New York bu...
Tags: Travel, New York, Trends, Personal, Anxiety, Google Docs, Dreams, Feld, Filson, Robert Graham


It never fails. Monday through Friday the kids are impossible to wake up in the morning. The weekends? They’re up – fresh like daisies – by 6:30AM! During the week I’m usually revisiting bedrooms 2, 3 and 4 times – trying to get little butts out of bed and out the door on time. My 3 big guys (in grades 6, 7, and 8) have to be at the bus stop at 6:55AM. I usually start waking them up at 6:15AM – and it’s a win in my book if they’re all down by 6:40AM. That gives them 15 minutes to eat something,...
Tags: Family, Parenting, Personal, Mommy, Victoria, Mom, Henry, Ben, Audrey, Activities with your Family

9 Ways to Free Yourself from Ruminations

Of all my symptoms of depression, stuck thoughts are by far the most painful and debilitating for me. The harder I try to move the needle from the broken record in my brain, the louder the song becomes. Ruminations are like a gaggle of politicians campaigning in your head. Try as you might to detach from their agenda, their slogans are forefront in your mind, ready to thrust you down the rabbit hole of depression. Logic tells you they are full of bull, but that doesn’t keep you from believing wh...
Tags: Psychology, Elsa, Disney, Stress, Personal, Mindfulness, Self-help, Depression, Anxiety, Self-esteem, Mental Health And Wellness, Self-worth, Ruminating, Kristin Neff, Group Beyond Blue on Facebook, Abraham Low

The Case for Downtime

I’m scared of downtime. That’s right, relaxation is downright uncomfortable for me. Part of me craves it like every other human being. Yet as soon as it is here, I twitch. I pace the house. I don’t know what to do with my hands and my legs — even more importantly, my brain. Sometimes the quiet space is too intolerable so I fill it with mindless activities like scouring Facebook or checking how many Twitter followers I have. My busyness is, at times, a defense mechanism whereby I can prove that I...
Tags: Psychology, Facebook, Work Life Balance, Research, Stress, Personal, Self-help, New York Times, Relaxation, Chris, Industrial And Workplace, Memory And Perception, Megan, Kreider, Annapolis Maryland, Sara Robinson

Hemangioma Birthmark on your Child

Hemangioma was a word I didn’t know well at all before July 9, 2013. Actually – I’m going to be honest with you – I didn’t even know how to say it properly! My beautiful Victoria was born with a hemangioma on the left side of her forehead.  I knew immediately that there was a pinkish/red mark there, but the nurse and doctor told me it might just be a bruise from birth and to wait a few days and see. Victoria was born via c-section and right after birth, as much as I was out of it from the medic...
Tags: Audrey, Personal, Family, Hemangioma, Victoria

Ties: Myself, by Any Other Name

After cancer surgery I was fiercely determined to survive. That meant reconnecting to my essential self and shedding my ex-husband’s name.
Tags: News, Parenting, Divorce, Personal, Names, Liver Cancer, Families and Family Life, Marriages, Separations and Annulments, Colon and Colorectal Cancer

The Hardest Thing

We China expats complain a lot. It’s pretty often that you hear people talking about “the worst thing” or “the hardest thing” about living in China. You hear complaints about the food, cultural issues, linguistic challenges, internet woes, pollution, etc. Many rivers being cried over here. And I’ll admit, I’ve thought about this issue myself (enough to come to a conclusion). The biggest frustration for me over the years has been related to the internet, and it’s gone from being a personal nui...
Tags: China, Personal, Linguistics

The Big 3 Benefits of Waxing Nostalgic

I tend to define nostalgia as a bittersweet reminiscence as we continue to live in the now and move ahead towards the future. Sometimes, there’s mixed emotions when thinking about the past, and some people avoid the subject matter and the whole “nostalgia song and dance” entirely. I also can recognize that there is a bit of a line to toe — a line of reminiscence versus living in the past and feeling perpetually stuck. Those who know me know that I’m quite the “nostalgic” individual. Nostalg...
Tags: Psychology, Amazon, Relationships, Personal, Nostalgia, Memories, Connection, Memory And Perception, Catskill Mountains

5 Questions for Self-Growth in the New Year

The adrenaline that pushed you through December has worn off and you’re feeling the January blahs. That’s not uncommon. In fact, January 24 is on record as being the most depressing day of the year, due to a combination a factors: Christmas bills, broken resolutions, and dark and dreary weather. However, if you are brave enough to sit with the uncomfortable feelings of this depressing time of year, January can be a period of important personal growth. With a new year, we get a blank page of pap...
Tags: Psychology, Research, Stress, Personal, Self-help, Creativity, Adam Sandler, New Year's, Personal Growth, Mental Health And Wellness, Motivation And Inspiration, Inspiration & Hope, New Year's Resolution, Overwhelm, Carlile, Schwartz

5 Questions for Self-Growth for a New Year

The adrenaline that pushed you through December has worn off and you’re feeling the January blahs. That’s not uncommon. In fact, January 24 is on record as being the most depressing day of the year, due to a combination a factors: Christmas bills, broken resolutions, and dark and dreary weather. However, if you are brave enough to sit with the uncomfortable feelings of this depressing time of year, January can be a period of important personal growth. With a new year, we get a blank page of pap...
Tags: Psychology, Research, Stress, Personal, Self-help, Creativity, Adam Sandler, New Year's, Personal Growth, Mental Health And Wellness, Motivation And Inspiration, Inspiration & Hope, New Year's Resolution, Overwhelm, Carlile, Schwartz

the north island report: update on us

Things continue to fall into place here, a little at a time. I'm enjoying our quiet weekends. Allan is off every Saturday, Sunday, and Monday; I work Saturdays until 5:00, then I'm off Sunday and Monday. This is more time off together than we've had in a long time, and having two consecutive days off every week -- without the added work from union responsibilities -- is so nice.Every weekend we get out to explore some local beauty. We'll walk on the paved walk path along the bay, or poke along s...
Tags: Travel, Google, Personal, Allan, North Island, Diego, Mississauga, Vancouver Island, Guido, Port Hardy, Laura K, Port McNeill, Vermont Don, Moving To Bc, Port Hardy Buy Sell Trade Facebook, Life In A Small Town

How Do You Stay Sober When You’re Homeless?

One friend found my homeless sober alcoholic life fascinating. She wanted to know if I smelled, where I went to the bathroom, and what I did all day. Once she even asked if I had a Big Book. From approximately 1 p.m. on June 5th, 2018 until around 11 a.m. September 5th, 2018, my three pit bulls and I lived in my Ford Explorer. Not only was I homeless with three dogs, but I also had over eight years of sobriety. My car was packed. While most of my belongings were in a local storage unit, my do...
Tags: Psychology, Personal, Homelessness, Ford, Homeless, Addiction, Recovery, God, Alcoholism, Dorothy, Stella, Sober, Publishers, Taco Bell, Sobriety, Stephanie

A Challenging New Role – Week 2 (52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks)

The  Week 2 prompt for “52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks” is Challenge. And do I have a challenge ahead of me! In October 2017, I accepted a position on the Board of Directors for my local society – Chariton County Historical Society. At the first board meeting I attended, I was asked if I would […]
Tags: Blogging, History, Personal, Challenge, Museum, Missouri, Artifacts, Genealogy, Historical Society, 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks, Chariton county, Chariton County Historical Society

Addicted to Sugar: The Other White Powder

In that first meeting I went to for my sugar addiction, I heard others admit to doing the same things I did. Sneaking. Lying. Throwing food in the bin to halt a binge only to come back later and fish it out to eat. It was right in front of my face, but I couldn’t see it for what it was for years. Addiction is a wayward beast. God knows you can’t see much when you’re laid flat on your back, pinned down by invisible yet ferocious forces. The narrative was just so unfamiliar that I doubted it w...
Tags: Psychology, Personal, Eating Disorders, Addiction, Sugar, Las Vegas, Brian Eno, Ewan McGregor, Binge Eating, Publishers, Health-related, ALICIA, The Fix, Food Addiction, Addicted To Sugar

Intention, Action and Accountability to Accomplish Your Goals

I don’t create New Year’s Resolutions  because, for myself and most others I know, they don’t last. As we have just crossed the threshold from 2018 to 2019, this topic is fresh on people’s radar. Diets, gym membership and smoking cessation programs take upticks at this time of year. At my gym where I work out 3-4 times a week, I notice that the machines are more occupied right before and right after Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Eve/Day. Does motivation run higher at those times...
Tags: Psychology, Family, Navy Seals, Friends, Habits, Accountability, Action, Personal, Exercise, Intention, Perfectionism, New Year's, Motivation And Inspiration, New Year's Resolution, Naval, Adm William H McRaven

I Learned How to Let Go of Pain — You Can, Too

“Find a place inside where there’s joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.” – Joseph Campbell I am certainly not unique in my experience of pain. Like physical scars — of which I have plenty — pain of any kind tends to hang around doing its dirty work until the one suffering takes appropriate action to help dispel it. Granted, some physical pain can only be ameliorated, not eradicated. That’s good enough in some instances, although not ideal. Having gone through numerous instances where I’ve s...
Tags: Psychology, Personal, Mindfulness, Self-help, Healing, Surgery, National Institutes of Health, Chronic Pain, Health-related, Emotional Pain, Harvard Medical School, Joseph Campbell, Peer Support

Reading in 2019

Great, a post about resolutions, just what everyone needs. Love ’em or hate ’em, the start of a new year is indeed the time to think about resolutions, things you’d like to try doing — or doing better — and for me it’s reading. Don’t get me wrong, I read constantly, but it’s usually limited to magazines, comics, bandes-dessinées, and tons of stuff on the web. I’ve been trying to get my book reading habit back up and running for years now, and it’s a constant struggle. I don’t know when it happe...
Tags: Travel, Books, Reading, Personal, Bond, Anthony Horowitz, New Year Resolutions, Don, Forever And A Day, Significant Zero, The Product Manager's Survival Guide

A New Look at Grief Beyond Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’s Five Stages

A few weeks ago, I said goodbye to a long time, dear friend who had become a sister of choice, a traveling companion, a ‘kvetch and moan’ sounding board, as well as a compassionate confidant who didn’t hesitate to call me on my stuff when needed. She died after a nearly two-year encounter with cancer. I hesitate to call it a battle as many do when given the diagnosis that she was. She was more a reluctant dance partner with the disease, attempting to improvise her way through the steps and t...
Tags: Psychology, Grief, Family, Relationships, Friends, Personal, Loss, Bereavement, Grieving, Grief And Loss, Michael, Inspiration & Hope, Health-related, Coping, Buddhist, Elisabeth Kübler Ross

6 Life Lessons I Learned Last Year

Danish philosopher and theologian Søren Kierkegaard once wrote, “Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” The beginning of a new year is an appropriate time to look back over the lessons learned from the mistakes and experiences of previous months. In 2018, I wrote two letters of resignation, grieved the ending of two significant relationships, and spent several weeks on a hospital waiting list for severe depression and weight loss. I fumbled, got lost, and confront...
Tags: Psychology, Suicide, Work Life Balance, Communication, Stress, Personal, Self-help, Depression, Self-esteem, Psychotherapy, Perfectionism, New Year's, Self-compassion, Mental Health And Wellness, Motivation And Inspiration, Marriage And Divorce

Why Therapy Didn’t Work for Me

When I was 16 years old, I had a metabolism that was to die for. I could eat anything I wanted, whenever I wanted to, and was always hungry, which led to developing an undesirable habit of snacking at 3 a.m. My parents saw the litter of dishes and snack wrappers in my room that I had been too lazy and tired to clean up before crashing back into bed and wrongfully concluded that I was closet bingeing. Coupled with my string bean frame, they were concerned enough to book an appointment with a th...
Tags: Psychology, Habits, Personal, Treatment, Eating Disorders, Anorexia, Eating Disorder, Psychotherapy, Therapeutic Alliance, Bulimia, Iris, Binge Eating, Adolescence, Janet, Janet Janet

My Nine Instagram Favorites of 2018

I used #2018bestnine to compile a collage of my top nine photos from Instagram for 2018. The top nine are ranked according to how many “hearts” (likes) were given on each picture. In case some of my followers aren’t on that social media platform, I thought I’d also post the compilation here as many of […]
Tags: Photos, Instagram, Social Media, Personal, Photographs, Genealogy, Genealogy Photo a Day, Genealogyphotoaday

On Being a Friend: Seeing Someone with Depression — and Seeing Myself

I am a friend. Therefore, these words are my own stories, opinions, impressions, and thoughts on having a friend with depression in this moment. They are not concrete or bible or forever — they are my truth right now. I am a friend. I think a damn good one. That is all, but sometimes it is a lot. As I think back, depression was always a part of our relationship. But at 18, 21, 24 we didn’t call it that. We didn’t know it was that. It was “caving” or “winter blues” or just, “I need a break”...
Tags: Psychology, Friends, Personal, Depression, Caregivers, Peer Support, Relating To Others

What You Can Expect from ME in 2019

I’ve been waiting for 2019 with wide, open arms! I’ve been ready for her to start because I really love the idea of a New Year – 365 new chances and new beginnings to new EVERYTHING! 2018 wasn’t a bad year by any means… there were definitely some struggles, but the good absolutely outweighed the bad. 2018 brought some really BIG things into my life… a full year in our new home and our new town, Victoria starting Kindergarten, Permission to Hustle Retreat coming to fruition, working with my fami...
Tags: Instagram, Parenting, Personal, Victoria, New Year, Audrey, 2019, MomGenerations, YouTube Lights Camera Action Video, Audrey Vera

(Not so) Wordless Wednesday – A Heavenly Birthday

On this date 79 years ago, my brother was born in (present day) Fairborn, Ohio. Back then it was Fairfield – Bath township to be exact – because Fairfield and Osborn had not merged yet. My brother was the oldest child born to my mom – and the only child born out of her brief […]
Tags: Photo, Personal, Fairfield, Genealogy, Wordless Wednesday, Osborn, Lovejoy, On This Day, Life and Death, Fairborn Ohio, Amore, Fairfield Bath

Welcome to 2019

Three of my colleagues at USV have first day of the new year posts up this morning that inspired me. Two are macro-related (Fred’s and Albert’s) but one is personal (Bethany’s). Take a look at all three – they are a good way to get ready for what is to come. Fred: What Is Going To Happen In 2019Albert: Staying Optimistic: Happy New Year!Bethany: New Year, new  mantra Fred’s punchline is “It is going to be a doozy” and I agree. But from my frame of reference, every one of my 53 years on th...
Tags: Trends, Personal, USV, Tss, Amy, Albert, Fred, Bethany, Feld, Carriage House, Chinese restaurant, Knoxville Marathon, Cowtown Marathon Fort Worth, Covenant Health Knoxville Marathon Knoxville

Learning From Sisyphus

The gods had condemned Sisyphus to ceaselessly rolling a rock to the top of a mountain, whence the stone would fall back of its own weight. They had thought with some reason that there is no more dreadful punishment than futile and hopeless labor. ~Albert Camus, The Myth of Sisyphus Twelve years ago, in December 2006, I accepted a position as a member of the first team of in-house executive coaches at the Stanford Graduate School of Business. Our first year was both exhilarating and insa...
Tags: Leadership, Change, Personal, Albert Camus, Becker, Stanford Graduate School of Business, Camus, Ernest Becker, Edbatista, Self-Coaching, Sam Keen, Ernest Becker Marcus Aurelius, Ann Wuyts Yay Flicker

looking back, looking ahead: the year that was 2018

Last year at this time, the wmtc i hate christmas tradition -- after being in decline for several years -- roared back in full swing.This year we enjoyed the two extra days off, and I found nothing to hate, or even dislike. About half the houses in our neighbourhood have holiday lights. People wish each other Merry Christmas, and when I say Happy Holidays, it appears unremarkable. And now it's New Year's Eve, one of the few holidays I really love. A time to look back and look forward, to take s...
Tags: Travel, Personal, Calgary, Allan, Ndp, North Island, Ontario, Mississauga, northern Ontario, Vancouver Island, Port Hardy, Laura K, CUPE, Moving To Bc

50 Things I Learned in 2018

2018 was a good year professionally and personally for me. I really felt HOME this past year because it was the first full year in our new house in our new town (incidentally the same town I grew up in). The only way I can describe the last year here is by saying I feel like we’re where we were always supposed to be. Does that make sense? This house and this town, it feels right and it feels good and it feels like HOME. That’s all you truly want for your family. Every New Year’s Even I sit dow...
Tags: Parenting, Personal, New Year, Resolutions, Audrey, Vera, Fortnite